A Wii Catastrophe
April MaeIn 18 years, I have only seen my husband cry once, but the other night, I found him in our basement on the verge of tears. He was sitting on the couch staring at the wall. He just kept saying, “They broke it. I can’t believe that they really broke it.” What he was referring to and what he was blankly staring at on the wall was the $900 flat screen TV that his brother bought him for his birthday. Now, let me state for the record that I never wanted the television. The basement is our children’s playroom, and I wanted it to remain a place of dress-up and arts and crafts. I did not want a TV down there, but, I relented because it was a gift and I certainly did not want the monstrosity hanging in my living room. So, my husband mounted this very expensive toy on the wall next to my daughter’s art work. Now, its surface looks a lot like one of her drawings – a big kaleidoscope of rainbows.
The next morning, we got the story of what happened to the TV from my 6-year-old daughter. Last week, my husband bought the Wii with his football pool winnings. Since then, she and my husband have been playing with it constantly. Well, that night when she was playing Wii Baseball alone, the controller flew out of her hand and smashed the TV. She said that she was afraid to tell us. Like a kid, she also said, “Mom, it’s ok. It is just a thing. As long as nothing happened to me, it’s fine.” Ah, the lesson that I have been teaching her since birth finally put to the test. Of course it is just a thing, actually a thing I know we do not need, but when a “thing” costs more money than I make in a week, how do I explain to her the seriousness of what is ruined?
I take full responsibility for the accident. She should not have been left unsupervised with such expensive things. But, I guess this is the dilemma that I am facing: do I replace the TV or not? The other two televisions that I have in my house are about ten-years-old. Neither is really made for something like the Wii. If I don’t replace the flat screen, the game system will pretty much be another useless expensive toy sitting in my house. The $900 mistake will turn into a $1,400 mistake. Do I teach her a lesson about money, or do I learn my own lesson about accepting that my children’s toys are much different than they were when I was a kid?
I did not want her to have the Wii. I did not want her to have a DS (which, by the way, she also broke.) I wanted her to just be creative and play outside and read. But, I think that raising kids today is not the same as it was even 10 years ago. Technology is erupting so quickly in every aspect of our lives. I am not sure that I am making the right choice by assuming that kids don’t really need these advanced toys. I am not sure that it is really in their best interest to deny them the things that all of their friends have.
I became an adult on the cusp of computers. Because I am someone who is slow to change, I never really felt the need to chase technology. I have gotten by just fine and have always been slow on the uptake when it comes to upgrading. I do not text, my cell is never charged, and I can’t stand when people constantly check their phone. But I am beginning to realize that I am the one who is at a real disadvantage now. Technology exists all around me, and I have no idea what is going on. I didn’t mind until recently, but now I recognize that technological awareness is becoming a basic life skill. My frugal Irish Catholic upbringing is hindering me in this ever changing landscape of I-Everythings.
I don’t want the same thing for my children. I don’t want them to feel out of the loop. I guess I am just struggling with how much is too much? I cannot completely reconcile the direction that the world is going with my values, but I don’t want my girls to be at a disadvantage because of my moral dilemma. I suppose every generation has faced this challenge in some way, but I am not sure if the stakes were as high. I know that my girls are going to live in a world of digital everything and I have some responsibility to prepare them for it, or at least not deny them it.
I know that there has to be a balance between what is available and what is necessary, but it is getting more difficult to figure out every day. The lesson of the balance itself most likely will be the most important and challenging lesson that I will have to teach them. For now, I think my girl has to learn how to swing a bat – virtually and in real life.
Reader Comments (4)
I cannot even be certain that had I been in the age range from 8-15 today, that I would not be a kid glued to a PS3 and computer. Nintendo came about in rage when I was in junior high school and while fun to do at night and during desolute winter months, I still played basketball, rode my bikes with my friends and got into trouble out on Long Island. Nowadays, these video games are so detailed and realistic....why go out and play football when you can be Tom Brady and play against the Jets anytime you want? Another factor too, when I was growing up on LI in my development you could not drive 100 yards dfown the street without seeing a group of kids playing baseball, football, hanging out, etc. Now, even thogh a whole group of new families are entering, I never see one kid out playing anymore. We used to say to our Moms in the summer" see ya later" at 9am and not be home again until dusk. Does that exist anymore? It seems alot of parents these days would prefer their kid be in the house than outside in the world where they cannot see them. Being a young parent myself, I would like to say that I want my boy outside experiencing nature and the world...yet this overprotective side of me has started to emerge. Check back with me in 8 years....
I entered college 16 years ago when the terms "email, internet, cell phone, blackberry, texting, apps" were completely foreign terms to most of this world. Now being in the workforce for 11 years , those things are all daily necessities I and alot of us need to get business done. The Information Age exploded with progression never before seen in human history. Alot of people got left behind beciase they, nor any of us, could have anticipated how quickly this technology permeated every aspect of our lives this quickly. We almost take for granted now that the very instrument we are all using to view this fine website is the most powerful informative tool in the world. Any question, topic, or subject in the world is accessable via your fingertips. This used to involve a trip to the library and hours going through stacks and microfilms and almanacs. This has become both good and bad. Great that we have access to this information...bad that it has made us a bit fat and lazy in the process since it is no longer a challenge to find this information.
Cripes...I go off on tangents...
I definitely think you should replace the TV. Do you buy a $900 one, of course not. As my husband pointed out, the Wii does not warrant high definition. The clarity on the broken TV may have been 1080, but 720 is more then enough for these type of games. It is only systems like playstation and xbox that need such high quality. Also, what size was the TV? You do not need to buy a 40" for the purpose of game playing. Anything around 30" give or take 2 inches will do the job. All of that being said, you can purchase a flat screen LCD for $300-$400. This way you do not loose the investment in the Wii and the priceless time she is spending with her father doing something they enjoy together (maybe the LBB could add a link to Walmart or BestBuy for this purchase!).
What does she learn? She learns that mommy and daddy can fix anything; that although she was scared, she should never feel there is anything that her parents can't help her to fix. Take the opportunity to teach her to use the wrist strap that accompanies the Wii remote. Live and learn, before you know it your girls will be grown and out of the house; then you'll be wishing they were back leaving their toys on the steps, their clothes on the floor, and breaking your TV. I guess that's why grandparents are so great and seem to have it all figured out.
I agree with CJ on the idea of being a child is foreign to me and much different than the world I grew up in. The idea of being out of the house was still much more alluring than spending the day watching television or playing on the computer. I agree with April and CJ that it is the parente that foster this aversion to the outside and I do not think it is all the parents' fault.
We do not trust our environment as much. We are aware of the dangers from germs and the sun. We are aware of infections and car accidents. We are aware of sexual deviants and child molesters. We are aware of how precious childhood is and how elusive it can become because we do not trust our schools and neighbors to raise their children the right way (our way).
When I was a child, I did not see the world as a dangerous place and my mom and dad didn't either. Our neighbors were known and trusted. We have moved to places that look nice, but we do not have the familiarity to trust. We trust television because that allows us to be released. We trust our family, that is smaller because of moving to different neighborhoods. We have smaller nuclear families that are precious because of time and economy. The house is safe and controlled. Maybe those video games, played long before, helped us garner an element of control, and we are trying to mimac them in our own lives.
I grow more insular and my children suffer. I want them to go out to explore the world, get bumps and bruises. But I stay inside, because I am tired of the bumps and bruises of the world. They will do what I do.
Great post and responses. We do explore some territory on this site. I agree with MIss Apple. You need to replace it. I don't know anything about TVs or Wiis yet, but if it gets me more time to write alone, then I will probably be there soon.
Thanks for the lunch. It was good.
As usual, I am in awe of people trying to parent in an environment that competes for the attention of their kids. I am so sorry for your situation, but it will be OK. Maybe not for your husband, but for your daughter, certainly. I do think that teaching kids that objects are just "things" is right. Maybe that's just me. As an "immigrant" to the digital world, who only found out about the existence of e-mail after college, I buy each new piece of technology with a wariness that must seem pretty funny to the good people at Best Buy.
I understand though. Objects are connected to feelings, too. But I feel there are no right answers to what you should do. You're a parent who considers and weighs the implications of your decisions. That's better than a lot of parents out there.