Lunch Break Lit - Comments

Nick Carraway comments on Strain- Part One

Nick Carraway — Sun, 26 Feb 2012 18:48:08 +0000

I really appreciated the economy of this first excerpt. You managed to communicate a lot about character and setting in a short space. Looking forward to the next installment. If the main character ends up at a pool hall, then we will know you've read Soldier's Home.

James Dugan comments on Strain- Part One

James Dugan — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 01:49:30 +0000

The mashed up food is a great metaphor for what is happening to this former soldier. Before the war, when things were simple, there were distinctions that seperated him from others, important things from unimportant, the real with the fake. Now, after his experience, the blending has occured and he has to reconfigure the universe.

The duffel bag is his soldier's life that he is not willing to give up. He prefers this life over the fake one he now has. I like how he adds the salt to his favorite meal, trying to make it taste better in his new life.

There are many things here and I wait for the next part. Good lunch. Did you ever read Soldier's Home by Hemingway? You would like it --

Patrick Edmonds comments on Valentine: The Christian - Part 1

Patrick Edmonds — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 23:12:23 +0000

I'm definitely intrigued. I like the idea that the priest hears the knock but doesn't rush to answer. Things are moving at his pace and on his time.

I also like the story that he's reading and I appreciate the connection of time to both stories and the unknown and expectation for both the priest and Jesus.

I'm looking forward to the future installments. This is an ambitious effort and another reason the site is the most unique on the web.

James Dugan comments on Crossing This Side of Paradise, A Three Minute Short Story

James Dugan — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 16:39:28 +0000

"a one way ticket off the island to any where."

Good scene -- I like the dinginess of the paradise that is rarely seen by anyone who doesn't live on the island. It is not upsetting to the main lander who knows this world also. He is both here and there. He will remain outside and his test results will cause him to go inside, further into himself, regardless of his present place.

Lunch is about escape. I am here and without and your story tells of how much a need to escape we need from reality. I like the idea of cactus in paradise. This hard, prickly plant surviving in an environment almost anywhere.

The narrator will survive -- not without pain, not without withering, not without luck.

Great escape for lunch -- I like the 3 minute format.

James Dugan comments on The Thief of Life

James Dugan — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 17:19:03 +0000

I can foresee great things for your mind and writing. I hope our community will help your reach your goals but more so help us to realize how important expression in quality writing makes everyday worth waking up for and every lunch to savor in understanding each other's individuality. Many happy lunches.

Alexis Fryer comments on The Thief of Life

Alexis Fryer — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 16:21:38 +0000

Thank you, much appreciated. This is a topic I see being pushed under the rug in one too many situations and I feel it is extremely important. I do not have a blog or website, this is actually all very new to me. I heard of this website and with much encouraging, i decided to take a chance and publish something. It never crossed my mind someone would actually read my story. But I will write more, I have got a lot on my mind afterall.

Thanks again.

James Dugan comments on The Thief of Life

James Dugan — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 01:09:01 +0000

Creative offering and welcome to lunch. The theme you present through the character is potent and a good reminder this time of year. I also like the use of second person in fiction; we rarely see it other than how to articles.

I guess we do like to blame others for our addictions. But don't humans thrive on habit? Isn't habit and addiction the same or is one good and the other evil? I believe a healthy evaluation is always good and your piece brings this to the reader without sounding like a preacher.

Great character and welcome to the lunch. I hope to read much more of you. Do you have a blog or website?

Sylvia16 comments on Literature Slips Downward on Google Trends

Sylvia16 — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 06:17:41 +0000

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Nick Carraway comments on The Bus Stop

Nick Carraway — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 03:44:08 +0000

I'm glad to see lit return after its long hiatus. This vignette shows your considerable growth as a crafter of characters. You manage to capture the meeting place of two extremes without resorting to the trite or fantastic. I think you have found your balance as a narrator, and it is somewhere in between these two characters. Nicely done.

James Dugan comments on The Bus Stop

James Dugan — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 23:39:00 +0000

Good vignette. Time moves on and yet things stay the same. A striking relationship: We can build and destroy in our day. Here I see the building -- the understanding we need to live together.

The youth -- so rushed

The old man -- so patient

I am not a fan of the idea that the suburbs hold the wisdom, but space and time does teach us. I get that metaphor. Good lunch and theme.